The fog has just lifted revealing the gray
Blogging Tunes - SomaFM: Drone Zone
We're all just in shock... and honestly, it's going to take a little while to get back into the "kick its ass mode." Right now, I'm just angry (with bouts of sadness) but I'll get there.
Looking back, the last 4-5 weeks feel pretty similar to Sept/Oct 2010 (minus the night sweats and the mouth sores.) Maybe that means it's not exactly AML... that it's some other major bone marrow dysfunction that won't need as aggressive treatment.
Still, it all lines up: increasing fatigue; little signs of energy loss escalating to full blown shortness of breath; increasing heart rate at rest; inability to work out; the whole nine. Now I can't even walk around without feeling like I'm going to pass out.
Still, back in 2018, we were told "chance of relapse is nil". No one else relapses 8 years out (let alone 10) from a successful BMT, right?
Yet here we are. My blood counts are fucked. Everything is low -- well except iron-related stuff.. that's all high. The condition is called PANCYTOPENIA. What does it mean? What causes it? How do you pronounce it? How do you treat it? You can find all that out here.
So what now? Well, on Saturday I was admitted to Marin General for an emergency platelet transfusion where I stayed for a couple nights. Gotta say, the new building is amazing. Nicest hospital I've ever stayed in. They found blasts in the blood so it's looking like some kind of leukemia.
So based on those results, yesterday I had a (very long and painful) bone marrow biopsy. You really don't want one of these if you can avoid it. Hey, at least I "tolerated it well!" 🙄
After the BMB they sent me home, so I'm getting to enjoy a little bit of beautiful San Rafael weather and some time with the fam.
We'll start to see some results from the BMB tomorrow and then I see Dr. Damon at UCSF on Thursday. What we don't yet know is... will that visit be an "appointment" or will I be "admitted" so we can start whatever the hell we're going to need to do. If I do get admitted:
- @Lisa M, ima come lookin' for ya on 11-Long or 12-Long or whenever you are!
- @Benji, we're going to be seeing a lot more of each other, I guess.
- @Brown @Raffi, depending on visiting rules, it would be great to watch Eagles/Niners with one of both of you this weekend. Actually, now that I think about it, maybe better to watch TNF with Brown and Iggles with Raffi. #amirite?
- @Schiff, you missed round 1 of this shit, you can make up for it now. :)
I'll post frequently here with updates. So check back often.
If nothing else, maybe we'll get the fundraising cranking for this year's Light the Night. Heather and the boys just got a fundraising page started, it seems. Thanks, love!
Speaking of Schiff... Hey Chum bandmates: at least we got the Dick's shows in, right guys?
Ha! I even got super tripping dreadlock dude in one of these selfies! See yellow arrow in second pic. 🤣
Here we go again, gang....